Saturday, May 14, 2005
I was listening to Orange Range's "Hana", all of a sudden all those passed years' memories fulfills my mind. and I wonder that who will recognize me after these many years of transition. this summer is quite different with last summer and all those summers before.
maybe it's just my body that is tired, maybe it's my mind. it can't be both at once, physical and mental at the same time, that will be too much and too harsh. life can't treat me like that.
perhaps I have to get use to this loneliness that will last for years. until someday that another person can sit right across a tea table from me, enjoy this comfortable silence
Poet says with her maggots at 7:56 PM
Thursday, May 12, 2005
so three years now, I am just writing this to myself
things change, different from a year ago, from two years ago, from three years ago
I don't know that if I still want to keep up with this or not, I am tired, or to be acurate, I am aging.
it is still meaningfull to see this though. how it got all started, bloomed, and hopefully the smell of time will never never whether. while this is happening, I will walk away, and take a deep sigh
anyways, good to see you all with your companions, keep them handy. for those who lost them, your condolence words and grief didn't go towards me, so bye. at least I am trying my best to say bye or farewell in a short way
Poet says with her maggots at 1:13 AM
